the eighteenth of august

today was the first day of school.

and these boys were excited. super excited.

because they love friends---i mean, learning. yes, learning. if you ask them their favorite subject in school, ethen will tell you lunch. cohen will tell you recess. see, i told you my kids looooooove learning. they get their love of friends, oops, i mean learning, from their mommy.

cohen is a big (but little) fourth grader and that is hard for me to wrap my brain around. fourth grade! i remember being in fourth grade. like it was yesterday. but it certainly wasn't yesterday since i'm old and all, but still. i remember it. like it was yesterday. now my very own cute-little-howling-chubby-baby-boy is making his very own fourth grade memories. how can this be? my heart breaks a little every time i think about how old he is getting. but then it gets put back together again because he still loves me. and pigs too. so if those things stay the same then i know i can be healed.

note to cohen: never stop loving your mommy! never. okay? okay. and pigs too. they'll be sad if you stop loving them. but not as sad as your mommy will be. nine years ago i made you promise me that you would stay a 6 month old roly-poly baby forever, but you must have had your fleshy little digits crossed, so i'll forgive that one. i knew it was a lot to ask of you anyways. just always love your mommy and things will be great. okay? sounds peachy.

p.s. please don't cross your fingers on this promise. my heart almost couldn't take that first broken promise.


and this boy? my number two boy is in grade number two! how can this be? HOW CAN THIS BE!? shouldn't he still be rockin' out in preschool? he should, he should. actually "bouncin'-burpin'-baby-buddy-bouncin'-baby-boy" should still be drooling away on his "untel nate's" lap. as you can see, i have a little issue with time and it stealing away my children. my children!

but at least these kiddos are excited for where time has put them. me, not so much. it is something i am working on. growth is good, right? growth is good. i hear this a lot, but it is hard when it happens so fast. and leaves stretch marks.

and i have some serious time stretch marks that i'm dealing with here. they'll fade and i'll not really notice them pretty soon, but right now they're fresh and i'm not happy about having discovered them today.

i love these kids. and i do love where they're at, too. growth is hard, but it is good. i just need reminders that it is good. being a fourth grader is cool. being a second grader is cool.

its just hard when time sneaks in and transports my babies into grades that i, myself remember so well.

those darn stretch marks are never easy or pretty. but at least they'll fade before the new ones set in and life will find its new normal again.

but seriously, time.........why fourth grade so soon? and why my babies? they're mine.

so here's my promise to you, time: i'll be happy with what you've done to my babies, if you would just simmer down and do it a little slower. like, a lot slower. going from crib to fourth grade in the blink of an eye is a little much, don't you think? i think so. my heart can't take it. signs of aging i know, but you did that to me, after all.

you be nice, and i'll be happy. done? done.

i think i speak for all the mommies out there.

i know i speak for all the mommies out there.