for the love of peanut butter jelly

this boy is in love. and has been for a full year now.

everyday at 11:30am he has a date with his one true lunchy love. he's very consistent and never late. (unlike his mommy.)

don't get me wrong here. he's played the field in his 4 year existence.

dinosaur shaped chicken nuggets? not anymore. those are for toddlers.

a great restaurant excursion with a beloved peanut allergic cousin whose own love of pizza equals that of gaven's devotion to his dear "peanut butter jelly"? nope. gaven will always prove faithful to his lunchy love and wishes on these days that he was really back at home. sitting at the table. on a date with "peanut butter jelly".

but anyway, back to the date:

occasionally, gaven demands that the date begin a little early. that's never good style. dates like these take a little time to get ready and don't like being rushed. but really, it is the sandwich maker that isn't quite ready to let the date begin before its time. sandwich makers should never be haggled. or begged. especially at 9 o'clock in the morning. and definitely not as soon as the date with "frostamini wheats" has just wrapped up. believe me. its just bad style.

tasty bread, grape jelly, peanut butter. gaven's midday meal trinity. the sandwich maker is also a key player. the pair may have never met if it were not for the sandwich maker.

on casual dates, "peanut butter jelly" is served on a paper towel instead of the formality of a corelle plate. these are gaven's favorite dates. these are the sandwich maker's favorite dates. no coaching needed. just quick and easy, and no wondering whether a "high-five-see-ya-later" would be appropriate or a long wet "wash" for the corelle would be the proper finish. just fold up the edges, don't let the crumbs fall, and throw away. the perfect end to a perfect date.

so come join us at 11:30am on any day you'd like. gaven loves company. and the sandwich maker would love to set you up. if you're lucky, the sandwich maker might even let you wash your own plate. if you promise not to break it in the process. but if you're like gaven, you'll want the casual date. you get to throw away your crumb filled paper towel all by yourself. that's a real treat. just ask the four year old set.

interview with a 6 year old male

please state your name:

e-t-h-e-n. ethen.

how old are you, ethen?

can i just say 7? are you going to write, "can i just say 7?!" ok, i'm 6 1/2.

ethen, i've noticed that you have 22 pencils in your backpack. why do you have so many?

because i like pencils. i have a pencil collection you know. i've been collecting them for 2 years now. no, i mean 2 1/2 years.

everyone knows that you are a super spy, ethen. where did you learn all your super spy skills?

well, i learned them from myself. i just do 'em. i love to be a spy because you get to spy on people and they never see you.

since you are a super spy, are there any super powers that go along with that?

no. not really. but i am super strong and i have giant muscles. i can lift up this chair. do you want me to lift it up for you? i can even lift it up with 4,000 cohens in it! mom, i have a band-aid. see.......

**warning!** the next picture you're about to see is of ethen instantly going into anti-vegetable mode. all you need to do is say that terrible "v" word and this will happen:




i'm going to say the "v" word now, ethen. try to contain yourself. ethen, why do you think "vegetables" are sooooooooo terrible? which one is the worst to eat?

the worst one is green beans!!! because they don't taste good. they taste terrible! they really do taste terrible! they all taste terrible! but the best one is pickles.

pickles are technically a fruit. oh well. at least you're willingly eating something that at one time or another was growing from a plant. ok, final question: what is your favorite color?

that's easy! you know it. its a "leprechaun "g" " color. guessed it? green! did you know that, mom?

this completes my interview with our strongest and sneakiest resident super spy vegetable hater.

if there's one thing you can take away from this interview, let it be the true knowledge that ethen hates his vegetables. all vegetables. and that is stating it so very nicely. i need a thesaurus to look up better words to fully describe his true and utter disdain of those horrible non-sweet goodies that come from the ground. ethen has always and hopefully won't always "strongly dislike" his vegetable friends. i can only pray for a miracle that one day the terrible truth of his vegetable abhorrence will subside.

pray for him, won't you?

maybe we can convert him over to vegetarianism?! or at the very least, tempt him into being omnivorous. as it stands right now, this boy is strictly "meatatarian".

that wish is probably right up there with the rankings of "when pigs fly" or, dare i say it, "when hell freezes over".

don't worry about the clowns, though.

they won't need coats anytime soon................

interview with a 9 year old male

please state your name:

can i do my nickname? darn. ok. cohen.

how old are you?

nine. i'm nine and i just turned nine 2 months ago.

what is your favorite color?

hot pink!? do you think that there are boy colors and girl colors?

seriously? hot pink? alrighty. cohen, do you have a favorite food?

ribs! did you think i was going to say that? mom, can i have a bunch of legos for christmas?

what do you want to be when you grow up, cohen?

you know.......a pig farmer. mom, if i ever have a pig farm will you ever come to it? mom? will you??

no. pigs are too stinky and naked. next question. what do you want for dinner tonight?

ribs! from famous dave's. can we really get some tonight? please?




well, there you have it. cohen likes hot pink (that was a surprise to me, but not too surprising), famous dave's and loves everything, and i mean everything, about pigs. he always has. but will he always? i guess some things you may never out grow.

cohen wants you to know that pigs are cute, pink and tasty. that's a triple threat in his book!

check back soon for more interviews with the males in my life.

can you guess who's next? there's only (only!) three left to choose from. but two of them may not comply.........and i'm not talking about the six year old.

interview with a 4 year old male

please state your name:

what's dat!? how you do dat!?

i'm asking you what your name is, gaven. so, what's your name?

gah-haah-beeh-hin!!

how old are you, gaven?

dis many.

what's your favorite color?

dark blue, light blue.

do you have a favorite food?

well, yeah. pizza and plain macaroni and cheese.

plain macaroni and cheese. really? ok. next question. what do you want to be when you grow up?

an army man. i was just kidding about being a lion. i don't like them anymore. they always bite.

what super power do you have?

light blue, dark blue. oh, super power? my super power helps me fly. well, i was just kidding. i don't have a super power. only if batman gives me some. like spaghetti meatballs with red sauce.

ooooooook. i'm not sure how to take that one. onto the next question. what do you want for lunch today?

peeeaaaa-nut buh-tter jee-eeeh-eeellly. how about some cheese crackers? i mean, peeeaaaa-nut buh-tter jee-eeeh-eeelly saaa-aah-aammmich!

gaven, do you know what day it is today?

huuuuh, i don't know. what day is it? maybe sunday or wednesday or ffffrriday. can i go now?

i hope you all enjoyed this interview with "gaben" as much as i did. some of the answer surprised me. some of the other answers, well, they left me a little confused. plain macaroni and cheese? what does that mean? have we been serving macaroni and cheese wrong all along? guess i better start searching the cookbooks for that one.

stay tuned for another interview with yet another male that resides in this household. there's lots of them to choose from................

spies and the truth about clowns

this is ethen. he is one of our resident spies.

i was very fortunate to get these shots of him. he's usually on a top secret mission with his secret agent super spy brothers.

occasionally, ethen declassifies his once top secret information.

just the other day he decided to let us in on a little secret the world (yes, the wooorld) has been keeping from its precious citizens. children and adults alike have all been in the dark about this piece of information i'm about to unload on you all.

brace yourselves.

no, really. you better be sitting down for this one.

ready?

ok.

*****clowns follow satan*****

you read that right.

clowns.......follow.......satan.

who knew?

you might have had an idea about this tasty tidbit that super spy ethen has unveiled. but did you really know?

i had my suspicions about this for a long time. small children the world over have had their suspicions too.

consider yourselves among the lucky to be "in the know".

super spy ethen gives his blessing to spread the word.

holy flashback!

this just in......unidentified georgian man has been identified!

repeat. unidentified georgian man has been identified!

by my sister to be exact.

who was scouring someone's facebook page.

and saw this mystery man in the picture:




i'm glad this facebook mystery has been solved.

case closed...............

(dbaggs is the one in the argentina shirt. after 14 years, it can become hard to identify people. especially them mystery men from georgia. so now you know. in case you didn't.)

thirty

on sunday, and all the days leading up to this past monday, i felt young. my age still said that i was young. i think i might have even still looked young. but on monday, it happend. the day came that finally changed my age to old. there is no shame in being thirty years old, but thirty and i don't quite seem to get along yet. thirty and my husband don't seem to get along either, and thirty came to visit him 5 years ago. he said that he always felt young because i was young. now does he feel old because i am old? i'll have to ask him when he gets home from work.

since thirty is here and apparently here to stay, i'm gonna have to do some getting used to moving up into this new decade of life. lots of cake and new shoes will do the trick this week. but what about next week and the weeks following, when thirty is not so new but still makes you feel just as old?

i know, maybe a blog.

maybe some more new shoes? ( i love shoes, just so you know)

i think i'll try both: as long as my husband is game on the new shoes thingy.........

(i just noticed in the photo that i've got a slight widows peak hairline. or is it a receding hairline?! lets go for the first choice. only men get receding hairlines, right? right??!!)

why you in da laba?!

i'd like to introduce batman. batman represents everything that i would never do as a parent. he is a cartoon character, you see, and i swore i'd never let my boys play with anything that has to do with cartoon characters. but here he is. in our home. and.......he's here to stay.




batman and gaven are great friends. why, just this past summer they spent every waking moment together.




one fine day in august, batman accompanied gaven to the store. on our way there, batman was having quite a time with a lava patch that seemed to pop up out of no where. "oh.......oh, batman........why you in da laba! get outta da laba!" gaven said. we both knew that this was no ordinary day for batman.




batman has never been allowed inside stores. every mother knows that small super heroes in stores are childrens wildest dreams fulfilled, and a mothers worst nightmare. super heroes become villains in stores when they are in the hands of their pint sized owners. batman is no exception. on this day however, batman was allowed in and he was never seen again. could an unforeseen Von Maur lava, excuse me, "laba" patch have gotten him? i guess we'll never know. but what we do know is that batman hadn't been seen since that fateful day in august. gaven missed his dear batman and cried frequently for him. gaven was never the same without his best friend. there was no one to rescue from the laba patch anymore. there was no one to fly around the room making gaven the happiest boy in the world.




we tried many replacements for batman in the following months. they were batman in shape and figure, but they were not the batman. not the same tiny batman glued to a 2 inch long ship that came from a happy meal, of all places (thats another reason batman represents the things i'd never do as a mother--but more on that at another time). we had given up on gaven's dear batman, until one day, our faith was restored. we got word that batman had been spotted in a basement box at a family member's house. gaven's cousin remembered that he too had the same happy meal toy, and still had that toy. and.... he was willing to give it to gaven!



so long story short...batman and gaven are friends. batman has been known to disappear for long periods of time, making a certain four year old boy very sad. batman gets caught up in da laba......a lot. batman still might be in that same unforeseen laba patch at Von Maur to this very day. batman and gaven were reunited on Christmas eve and the days of batman and gaven have been bright and sunny ever since. thank you to the cousin that i am not sure if i can name on this blog because i am not sure if his mother wants me to. see, i'm still new at this and have no idea what i am doing. but i'm getting there.

the beginning (and maybe the end?)

i have no idea what i am doing, so bear with me. a blog seems fun. everyone tells me to create one. so here it goes. check back soon and there may be some progress. and there might not be some progress. i'll figure this out sooner or later. either way, come back.